Realist Thoughts Vol. 1--The Implacable Affliction: Love

For those of you who really don't feel like reading, here's the whole thing in a sentence: Love is like the lottery, you can only dream of ever getting it, but the best time to get it, is when you're already stable; So pay your bills, invest your efforts, and hope that it finds you.


Love. It's the one thing that truly has nothing to do with people. It's by chance, yes by chance, that people even fall in love at all. I might say that love can be based on the actions of another, that if you're some combination of desirable things, someone will "love you". However, evidence and history suggest the contrary. Everywhere we look, we see "love". We see the tired expressions of it. The flowers, the money, the affection, the PDA, the this and that. That's not love. That's what you call a pathetic effort to authenticate what isn't real, and a catering to the positive behaviors of another, the norm, the obligation to paint a certain picture, to create a particular atmosphere. Might I remind you, the only need to create something is in the event it isn't there. Again, this is not love.

So what is love then? Love, that gambling star of fate, is more readily seen in the harshness of futile actions. In other words, the reason love is so rare, is that the chances of it being reciprocated substantially are very low. As long as there is such a thing as a past, as long as we are subject to the ideas of those around us and subsequently continue to create our own definitions of love, further corrupting its nature, we prolong any chance of love finding us.

In its nature, its rawest sense, love is an unexplained devotion to another, regardless of circumstance or condition. It is an irrational belief that your being is undoubtedly connected with another. It isn't logical. Love is not "you do good by me and I'll love you", it's someone ripping your heart out and stepping on it and you still, against every ounce of sense your possess, can't stop loving them.  Love is the inevitable sacrifice of identity. This lack of return. It it is so rare to find two people who understand love is but one piece to the puzzle. Perhaps you've experienced love before first coming to this realization. If so, then you have seen the hell love can be. But for you, my friend, there is hope.

There is only one hope to be found by love. Educate yourself. Know that love in and of itself isn't enough for a good relationship. And know that love is separate from all those things that really matter: compatibility, communication, common interests, physical attraction. You see, all these things together make for an environment that would lure that fateful love to your side. Even then, you can't expect it (love). But if it does come, be with someone whom you would want to fall in love. Don't force it. Affection and love are two totally independent things. Worst case, you might argue love is a type of affection. But as we all know you can love and hate a person at the same time. Relationships don't serve the purpose of loving one another, but rather loving one another serves the purpose of a relationship. Understand that second statement. Loving one another serves the purpose of a relationship. In other words. Don't dream about love. Find people who make you happy. Be in relationships with those people. And let love find its way to you, so that it can make heaven out of something already beautiful.